"WHERE IS THY VICTORY?"
(Round Robin friend Ardyth H. writes of love-across-the-border -
a record of personal experiences)
Dreams are dreams, and astral experiences are not to be mistaken for them. Those who have the actual living experience of the astral excursion are unmoved by the mouthings of those who are ignorant. It is true that the basic revelations of most dream sequences lie in normal life experiences, including those of sex. But in astral journeys, without exception, all happenings are more real, more rich in content.
Now, my own journeys are made in one of two manners; either I awaken there out of a dead sleep on this side, or else I am fully aware of my crossing over. In the latter case, two arms, as firm and lifelike as my own, lift me from the bed; there is a sense of swift upward flight, an abrupt arrival, the change of control, the visit, the return - and again the control of my own earth body. Perhaps this is a little beside the point of what you wanted me to write about, but I want you to know that I am not inventing or imagining any part of what of what I am telling you.
I always disciplined myself, even as a little girl. Perhaps these experiences are only part of a general plan for my life. Once I tried to tell a friend, a medium, about some of the things that happened to me, and she told me bluntly that I was possessed - to pray that it might be overcome. Hell has no depths that I did not touch, in an agony which lasted three days and nights. But at the end of that time I was taken out of the body and presented to the Mentor or teacher of the young man of whom I shall speak. This Mentor told me gravely that for twelve years "they" had been perfecting plans "for this hour", and that they had left no stone unturned to make their work perfect. They hated to see me suffer, but I must learn to wait on the truth as it would be revealed. I have never talked about it since.
I first saw Pat (not his real name) in my 15th year, tho even then astral experiences were not new to me. I was taken into a room, clothed beautifully, and seated on a divan. A young man stood before the fireplace. He told me that he was going away for a time, "for development and study". When that was taken care of he would return, and "then we shall never part." To this day I have not forgotten the bitter sense of grief and loss I experienced. I returned and went to sleep peacefully in my dense body, but the next day I was sore and felt bruised about the chest, as if the pain of my grief had been physical.
For five years nothing happened. In fact, I very seldom even thought about the matter. During this time my mother died, I married, and became the mother of a little boy and a new daughter. Then suddenly, without warning, I began having one psychic withdrawal after another. They were far more, now, than the vividly colored dreams of childhood; they were actualities in which I had actual participation. And during these visits I became increasingly aware of Pat and his attentions. He took over control of the situations which involved me. We had long discussions on such topics as reincarnation and predestination. And these soon passed into personal subjects which I find hard to put on paper.  They were subjects which dealt with both spiritual and physical completeness - what it is, and why we fail in achieving it. The spiritual union - many things which sound silly here, but take on clarity and reasonableness 'over there'.
Pat often speaks of the time "When we are wed," of the "consummation" and of "our home"... Up to this time it has gone no further, and as to what will happen next, I am reluctant to try to say. But Pat has declared that we shall be together "before the world is through with you." We are often together and whether we are alone or in a group, I find in these visits the only real contentment I've ever known. There's nothing like it anywhere else in this world. The emotional details are hard to talk about, but there is no doubt that between us two are the symptoms of "being in love". The desire to be together dwarfs every other emotion, and undoubtedly this in itself can bring about all else that we desire. And so Pat himself has told me.
Now in spite of all this, or along with it, I think I can say honestly that my friends hold me to be a loving and generous mother, and a good wife, and a good friend - except perhaps for the moodiness which seems to mark the lives of many psychics and sensitives. I am considered normal and intelligent... And so this is the story as well as I can write it. - Have you any idea how hard it is to get these things on paper?
The Round Robin Editor has had much correspondence with A.H., has confidence in her good faith, and does not believe her experiences are to be disposed of by the usual handy hypotheses of dream, autosuggestion, sex complexes and-so-forth, fifth-and-further. (There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio Alger, than are dreamed of.) We consider the whole account of sufficient importance to justify adding further points from the letters of A.H.
The encounters with Pat are not all on the other side, tho the presentation is considerably changed. Free intercourse is possible only when I am making a visit 'over there'...
I have many times been dragged back from a good sleep to see and hear Pat's lecture to a dismal, woe-begone young man who has suddenly been snatched from earth life. A lecture on the 'advantages of the of spirit life'. I am purposely awakened so that I respond to Pat's presence, his thoughts, and so on - the idea being to convince the love-lost visitor that all certainly is not lost.
Once in a while, if the visitor is a controlled and intelligent person, he is rewarded for his attention by personally 'contacting' me. I can't describe this except to say that for a moment he is in perfect rapport with me - as perfect as Pat has been able to achieve. They are usually timid and responsibility-ridden and it certainly fires their enthusiasm. From my vantage point I can read their intentions, and for the most part they are 'Now I can see Mary! ... Now I can be with her!' This seems to be their main ambition - and I'm not trying to be funny, either. Pat says that thruout the ages full consummation has taken place,  and still does so, tho it is now much more rare. He says that it depends entirely on the rate of development into which the earth partner is born. I don't believe in reincarnation so I don't understand what he means by that.
I'm certain there is fulfillment for the desires of souls, but whether it is partly physical or a matter of soul rapport only, I can't say. They come to the same thing, a desire to be a part of 'the one', but sex has a different aspect 'over there', so far as I have been able to see. I know that lovers will brave anything to be together, but I cannot say what the outcome of such union may be. §
Pat says that consummation between partners before they meet in 'heaven' is rare (I think, myself, that dream consciousness takes its place). However, here are some things Pat has said. I'll set them down for your own enlightenment:
Give us until the baby gets to school (he is two now).
You can't imagine what can be done in this instance if both partners are willing that it shall bedone!
Suppose you do live for 30 years more! Did you really think you would have to die before we could he together? It will be much sooner than that. Everyone here is for us!
I have had many elderly ladies, including my husband's grandmother who died years before I met him, come to kiss me goodbye and wish me safe return home. They say, "We are so anxious for you to be with us again, and soon." Everyone accepts the whole idea as a matter of course.
Well, it's an unusual life, but I am perfectly at home in it, as if I were born for it. To at least some students of the Unknown, my story will not seem untrue or impossible. Will you let me know if this draws any comments?
The Editor's opinion is, it should 'draw comments'!
Also, he can construct in advance, in his limited way, the comments of the whole tribe of material minded psychiatrists and psychoanalysts. The dream-fantasy and pathological point of view do not jibe with a considerable mass of data from spiritistic and 'occult' sources, information from Adepts and from experienced travellers in the astral - who are far more numerous than most folk imagine. He considers much of this data far more dependable than the lucubrations of orthodox psychologists.
The point about the sublimation and intensification of the love-relation on the invisible planes (§) is generally accepted occult teaching, tho studiously glossed over by most spiritualists. Sex in all of its thousand forms of manifestation is omnipresent in earth life; the idea that this basic energy is suddenly replaced by a love for harp twanging is not what one would call adult thinking.
But the basic issue presented by the 'case' of A.H. is the possibility of a real and continuing love relation between lovers on two different planes of existence. 'Different' planes, but not separated. We accept this, tho we cannot here explain in just what sense, nor a tenth part of our reasons. We think such knowledge is important and legitimate, and its presentation a proper service in the cause of knowledge and human welfare.