A Narrative of Occult Experience

by M. C.

(ROUND ROBIN presents herewith a very remarkable first-hand narrative of occult "contacts" and instruction. The writer, M. C., is well-known to the editor and is a well educated, honest and highly dependable person of exceptional mental abilities. We have no doubt at all concerning the truthfulness and accuracy of details in this very unusual document of personal experience. It was not prepared for ROUND ROBIN in the form of an article. but came to the editor as a personal letter.)

You say I have a story? Well, you are quite right. Like everybody else in the world, I have. As I remarked to you, I cannot offer the testimony of eye-witnesses in support of that story, for the simple reason that for most of the events I could record for you, there were no other witnesses. The whole process has been almost entirely an individual affair.

That does not decrease its value to me, however much room it may leave for objection to those who demand legalistic proof, or so-called scientific proof. From the first, my instructor has been uninterested in advancing proofs of his existence to other people. His answers to queries about that indifference have always been made from one or both of two points: (a) the abundance of evidence already in existence for the facts of telepathy, projection, the etheric (and other) worlds, and all the rest of it, which, if weight of evidence meant anything, is already sufficient to have swung the balance of opinion in its favor long ago; and (b) his work is not a public activity. There are those who prefer to broadcast information. Their talents, capacities and training all fit them for that kind of activity. On the other hand, there are those who, like him, concern themselves with the instruction of a few individuals, and who present that instruction in great detail over a period of many years.

His first appearance was abrupt and sudden. I awakened in the middle of an April night, in 1930, to find him standing in my room. His presence startled me, but inspired no real fear, and his immediate reassuring greeting put me at ease at once. In appearance he was tall, about six feet, moderately muscular, but not at all fat. His features were clear-cut, well proportioned, and slightly aquiline. He had a deeply olive skin, no beard, and his black hair was cut very short. He was dressed in a long woolen garment of a deep red color, and over his shoulders was draped, shawl-fashion, a length of the same material with a wide yellow band at one end.

He told me that he was a 'living' person, just as I was, and that what I was seeing there in my room was a projection, or materialization -- a kind of 'solid shadow' of him. His solidity at that moment was abundantly obvious, for he had awakened me by turning on the large flashlight on my night table, and setting it up in such a way that it lighted the room. He was as opaque as any person of around a hundred and eighty pounds would be, and cast the usual shadow.

He stated at once the reason for his presence, informing me that he wanted nothing from me, but that he had come to offer me certain information if I wished to receive it. He went on to say that I happened to be one of those people whose development had resulted in a constitution so constructed as to permit a direct approach such as he was making, and that I possessed certain innate aptitudes that would permit me to learn a very useful technique of integration.

Naturally all this was intensely interesting to me, but when he asked me point-blank if I wanted to make myself useful to other people. I had to tell him [4] quite honestly that I hadn't thought much about it, one way or the other. This answer didn't seem to surprise him. He laughed and said, "Well, think about it." He went on to say that as we go through life we inevitably affect other people, and asked me if I didn't think it was a good idea to learn how to make that effect more constructive and positive than destructive and negative. I replied that it would seem logical to make it as beneficial as possible.

He proceeded to explain what he meant by integration -- that is, the entire human being (body, emotional content, and mind) working together as a unit under the control and direction of the enlightened mental element, which he spoke of as being the 'highest', or 'true' or 'real' self of any human being, and in all human beings very powerful and essentially good.

He told me it is not easy to reach a state of such integration, but that it is possible (although not probable) for a person to reach it within the space of one lifetime. Like any technique, it requires study and application, and competent direction -- instruction -- is a big help, although by no means a definite assurance of success. Natural aptitudes, however, are absolutely necessary before such instruction is offered by him or his associates. As he said, there would be small reason to try to make a violinist out of someone who obviously possessed no talent for music. On the other hand, if the person possessed the necessary interest and ability it would be a shame to allow it to remain undeveloped and disappear for want of attention.

I remarked that there must be a great many people in the world with as much 'talent' for his technique as I possessed, if not a great deal more. He replied that, indeed, there were many such people, but that not all of them could be instructed in the same way. There are many types, and for each type there is a special approach that fits in with the special needs, and he warned me that difference has absolutely no causative bearing on relative quality. Apparent difference is not a sound basis from which to estimate superiority or inferiority.

I told him I couldn't decide at the moment whether or not I wished to accept his offer of instruction, but that I found it definitely interesting. My attitude seemed to please him, and he told me that I was not expected to decide anything on the spur of the moment. I should consider what he had to say for a while and decide deliberately and with care whether or not the things he would say to me appeared to be reasonable.

When I asked him how I would be sure, next morning, that his visit had not been an unusually vivid dream, he suggested a plan. I got up and rearranged several of the more permanent objects in the room, then placed a book across the top of an empty vase. Then I went back to the bed, and he proceeded to rearrange my rearrangements. Finally he took the book off the vase, put it in a different place, turned the vase upside down on it, and with an amused smile picked up a pencil and balanced it neatly across the upturned bottom of the vase. In the morning my usually neat room was just as he had left it, rearrangements, book, vase, pencil and all.

We continued our conversation. He asked me if I had heard of reincarnation, and I told him I knew the meaning of the word, but that was all. He then asked if I had heard of Atlantis, and I said I had in a general way. There had been an article about it in a Sunday supplement a couple of years before, and I remembered some family talk about it. That was all I knew, however. He then told me that I had lived in Atlantis during the days of the last remnant of that continent, and that I had witnessed the destruction. He offered to show me what had happened, so I sat propped up against the headboard while he sat on the foot of the bed, and the whole story unfolded before my wide-open eyes like a cinema.


The story embraced about two and a half months of time, and ended with my own death, which was not a loss of consciousness or identity, but simply a transference of awareness to another 'world'.

I was thrilled and deeply interested, and wanted to write it all down at once so I would remember it. He assured me that I would have no difficulty in remembering, but he asked me not to make any written notes of anything he told me or showed me until I had decided whether or not to accept his instruction, because, if I did decide to accept, then notes would not be permitted as part of the necessary training. I could, however, draw a map, if I desired, of the island. This I did.

He came again in about a week, and we had another long conversation, During the next month he made four or five of these visits, and in the end I decided to turn the matter of my education over to him. I have never had the slightest cause to regret that very vital decision.

It is interesting to note that the two family dogs that slept in the house never barked at him, although they very definitely knew of his presence and upon at least two occasions one of them was present in my room at the time of his visits and was petted and handled by him.

During the early years of our association he made a number of these 'shadow-visits,' but as time went on they became unnecessary, and were discontinued. He has given me to understand that they are difficult to accomplish and require an enormous expenditure of energy -- and that he has other 'students' who still require them for their reassurance. He did not discontinue them, however, until he had established definite and unmistakable means of making his 'presence' known.

From the beginning every aspect of my education was directed in detail by him. He chose the subjects I was to take in high school, and decided whether or not I was to study the text-books supplied for the course. Usually my acquaintance with those text-books authorized by the school turned out to be very slight, sometimes consisting of a single reading of the lesson, or perhaps one reading of the book at the beginning of the year, after which it was put away and I received the information required -- and much more -- at the 'night school' as I called it. I carried five subjects in school, and did extra work during my Junior and Senior years in astronomy, physics, and organic chemistry -- some of this at the local University, and some of it via special after-school instruction from a science teacher at the school who was interested in my work. It impressed him when I insisted on taking both semesters of high-school physics at the same time -- and did it with a grade average of 95. In addition, he was well aware that the only math I was taking in school consisted of algebra and a semester of business arithmetic.

At first I did not have any visual memories of where I had been or what I had been doing at night. I simply woke up in the morning with the extra added knowledge impressed on my consciousness. I soon discovered that this consciousness had extensions of which I had been unaware before. Very often the new knowledge did not appear in my waking awareness until the school-teacher would ask a question. Then I would know the answer. After a few experiences of this kind I began to trust the phenomenon and to feel more assurance about the whole process.

Within a few months, however, I began to have memories of having visited a definite place, of having gone to a definite building, seen certain people, and studied those things I remembered. Sometimes there would be a lecture or a discussion. At other times the instruction would be given by means of pictures such as my friend had shown me during his first visit. Sometimes we would go to other places with the teachers, or visit a large and varied museum of knowledge, with fascinating exhibits embracing every conceivable subject. The prohibition of [6] written notes continued in effect, however, until 1945, on the principle that whatever one can remember is known, but whatever has to be written down is merely an accumulation of extraneous material, which, while it has its uses, does not contribute much to the acquisition of the technique of integration under study.

Since 1945 I have made a few notes, neither very extensive nor complete, on certain aspects of the knowledge that has been offered me. I'm still in the process of learning to recognize the people who will be interested in them. In one or two cases I have 'bumped my head' very uncomfortably, and have grown to be more cautious. My instructor is in no sense a 'guide', so he doesn't tell me what to do or what not to do about things like that. I have to develop my judgment, he says. However, I've noticed that he comes to the rescue whenever I get into serious difficulties or do things that are likely to become dangerous. As I mentioned before, he is a person like ourselves, living in a chemical body in the dense chemical world, and he is a Tibetan by birth, and a Lama. At the time of his first appearance I knew nothing of either Tibet or lamas, but since that time my interest and consequently my information have both expanded considerably. The other teachers -- those at the 'night-school' -- however are not all connected with a chemical vehicle, and in some cases never have been. Yet they are as human as we are, if not more so.

This is one of the points where the information the controls of the M. P. seances are giving seems to parallel what I have received -- i.e., that man is originally an inhabitant of the etheric world, and that relative to his history, his presence in the dense chemical sphere is a 'recent' development. I wonder how much more of that interesting heresy they will present to you. My guess would be -- quite a lot.

According to my own acceptances, not all humanity takes part in these chemical excursions that we call 'life in the world.' By far the majority of our brethren prefer life 'on' the world to life 'in' it. They have told us again and again that only a person ignorant of his possibilities would be content with dense chemical life, and a few of them have tried to show us how to reach a point of knowledge where our excursions into the dense chemical world will be definitely and completely a matter of deliberate decision by an integrated, enlightened composite self, instead of a more or less blind response to blindly generated compulsions. To them we are the halt, the lame and the blind -- and the dead.

During the period of our dense chemical involvement most of us are incompetent in our natural environment, the etheric world -- if we are not, indeed, in an actual coma. Some of us can be brought out of that condition to some degree for short periods of time, and taught to function rationally during those periods. There are people there who consider this kind of effort to be important and worthwhile, and they are our instructors, helpers, guides, teachers, and, in effect, our physicians. Some of them come into the chemical world to work at the problem from this side. Others remain in the etheric sphere to work with our torpid etheric consciousness. Between them the two groups in the two divisions of the physical world cooperate in an attempt to educate those people who are interested in learning. They make as many approaches to the problem as there are types of people, and while there are many of those willing workers, it is as the Christian Bible says, "The harvest indeed is great, but the laborers are few," (relatively speaking).

As you will see from the implications of some of the statements above, the ideas I have absorbed disagree considerably with many of the accepted tenets of occultism and the teachings of the religions -- even of that religion toward which I feel most strongly drawn. Yet, buried in occult works, and in the various 'bibles' of the world, is the information that supports these ideas. In addition, and probably far more pertinent at the time, actually, there are these 'voices' -- in San Diego and who knows where else -- crying into the modern wilderness their fragments of essential information.

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